my maid of honor speech for my sisters wedding!
13 years ago
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
The Dangers He Passed
We first see a glimpse of Othello and Desdemona's love in Act One, Scene 3. Othello tells the court that Desdemona loves him for the dangers that he has experienced in his life, and that he has "charmed" her with his adventurous tales. Similarly, Othello respects and admires Desdemona for her stability. Do you think that this can still be classified as true love or do they each simply love what the other represents? Consider each of their impassioned speeches to the courts regarding their affections for one another.
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19 comments:
I think that Othello and Dessie are simply bewitched by each other, and do not have a true love. This wasn't my original thought, but after our discussion in class, I can agree with everyone who thought that their relationship is not true love.
It is reasonable to think that two people can be attracted to each other the way they were. Othello told the court his account of their love, saying that Desdemona "wished she had not heard [his story], yet she wished that heaven had made her such a man..." (1.3.187-188). He, in turn, admired her "for her stability". This would do just fine as a "conversation starter" for a relationship, but I don't think there is much depth for their love to base itself on if things went wrong. After all, the most successful relationships take time to nurture and flourish, and though we don't know how long they have known each other, neither of them seem to know what lies deep in the other's heart. Othello is so blindly trusting, that he could easily have missed something in Dessie.
The lines that left an impression in my mind was not one from either of the lovebird's speeches, but from Brabantio--"Look to her, Moor, if thou hast eyes to see. She has deceived her father, and may thee," (1.3.333-334). For me, this spoke volumes about Dessie's character, because though it is very possible that her father was blind figuratively, his vision cleared rapidly when he saw what had happened with his little girl.
So, yes, after that long, unstructured rant, I (think) I have reached my point--it's not true love.
Honestly, I did think that their love was true. I thought that their love was based in understanding. They felt that they could really comprehend where each other was coming from and they could support each other. Even though they only said that they fell in love becuase of the stories and the pity, I think there was more to it than just that. They probably got to know each other and found they were really in love. Their story i thought was kind of romantic.
However, since I am answering this question after we know a little bit more about them, I have to agree with Karolina: their love is not true. I say this becuase it wont last. We know this. Their is going to be a breaking point in the realtionship showing that their love was never really true. I think that the initial love was just that period that every couple experiences of pure bliss where there is nothing wrong. I mean, they just got married and were excited, etc, etc.
We know, though, that it doesnt last.
I agree with Karolina/Faith; I don't believe this is true love either. However, I believe that their love for each other has the ability become true love. The way I see it, their love is all about admiration. They both love each other for their actions, but that's not enough to keep them in a relationship permanently. Eventually, this admiration will wear out and the only thing that will save them is learning how to love each other. It sounds so typical, the whole "learn to love" deal, but seriously, that's what Othello and Desdemona need in order to ensure that their marriage lasts. Not that Iago helps that happen...
Anyways, back to the question. They love each other for what they represent: it is not true love. That's like, if I say I love this actor or that soccer player, it's not true love. I admire the work they do, and that's about it. Same goes for Othello and Desdemona-not true love.
I too, agree with Karolina/Faith/Pelton. The relationship shared between Desdemona and Othello is not true love. It's merely lust. I know I'm being kind of repetitive here, but the two only like what each other represent. In all honesty, there hasn't been any evidence in the book that they even truly know anything about one another. Desdemona needed a "sweet escape", if you will, and Othello just wanted to be admired. They were both really lonely in their own ways, and wanted someone who could take them out of their misery.
That being said, the fact that they're claiming to be in love is only going to hurt them in the long run. In the name of love, they're tearing apart their lives, more so, Desdemona, who no longer has a "father". They are both being naive, and like I've mentioned in class before, their love story reminds me so much of Romeo and Juliet.
One of the main reasons I don't believe that the two are in love is because they're love story is very similar to Romeo and Juliet's. they apparently feel in love at first sight, and frankly, i don't believe in love at first site. If you tell yourself that you're in love with someone just by seeing them from afar, you're either really desperate or incredibly naive.
But that's just me.
I feel that Othello and Desdemona's relationship is sweet, but there is something lacking to it. I agree with all the previous entries before me. (It's funny, though, how we always try to sabotage a character's romantic relationship) Anyways, I wholeheartedly agree with Faith that their connection comes from a mutual understanding of one another. They possess compatibility, an important element of a successful relationship. However, compatibility alone doesn't suffice. Two people can be very compatible, understanding, be on the same intellect level, but yet, if that were the case, I think that a lot of people would find "love" anywhere. There's definitely another element, and I think it comes from the feelings between each another. When Othello speaks in court, he gave me the impression that he regarded Desdemona as "this gentle lady", and he even admits to being too old to want to her just for lust.
It seems as if Desdemona only likes the idea of being with Othello because of his uniqueness, his race (I'm guessing she likes to rebel), and the concept of just being in love with him. Obviously, I also see another flaw in understand and compatibility - that a relationship begins to have no purpose. If you and your significant other are understanding and agree on a lot of things, wouldn't it be boring? I almost want to agree with Iago that Desdemona will soon get bored of Othello. I just feel their relationship needs to developed.
Oh, and I don't want to even TALK about Romeo and Juliet and how it connects with Othello and Desdemona, because I felt that Romeo and Juliet's love foundation was lacking right in the beginning when they first met. Othello and Desdemona are in the same "passionate, different, rebellious" situation, but Othello isn't really a passionate, over-the-top speaker as Romeo, so it gives the audience the impression that Romeo and Juliet's love had much more depth, when the Othello-Desdemona and Romeo-Juliet relationships are pretty much the same.
I don't know. I'm going to have to keep reading the text to keep formulating my response. On one hand, it is possible that they actually love each other for many/an endless supply of reasons. Desdemona could appreciate Othello's strength, bravery, and cleverness, as evidenced in battle. Othello could appreciate Desdemona's interest, concern, empathy, and inner strength.
On the other hand though, it could be a case of Hugh Hefner and his Playboy bunny girlfriends p where they are just using each other for their respective status/money and...youngness...(yes, Miss Winkler, I know that "youngness" is not a "real" word"...whatever). It could be that they are not really attracted to each other as they present and reflect themselves, showing the qualities that make the love burn, in battle and the like, but are just interested in the shallowness of being associated with the battle in general. In real love it is not about the status or the places it can get you. It is being interested in being associated with someone who you care about so entirely and admire all that they do and are because of how and what they are as a person
I think that at first glance the couple is only in love for what they represent. They serve as a balance for each other, Othello being adventurous needs some stability and peace in his life and Desdemona clearly fills that gap. But Desdemona wants adventure and exploration, it is clear that that is what she desires when she pleads the to the duke that she must go to Cyprus with Othello. So yes I do think it is a superficial love powered by their desires.
With a little forsight, I have definitely confirmed my prediction of their love through Othello's worry. Othello's doubt serves as proof that he really does not love Desdemona because his perfect saint of a wife has ruined her image or reputation by sleeping with Cassio. Although there is no real evidence that supports Othello's suspicions yet, he still worries she is not honest to him. He even said that he rather send her away than share her with other men. That is not true love because they would try to somehow work it out since their love is so "strong." Hello, there is such a thing as forgiveness people!
I don't think that the foundation of Othello and Desdemona's love is a strong one, but I do think they are in love none-the-less. Though they do love each other for what they represent, that is a stronger foundation than that of most couples in this time period. In fact, most marriages are arranged, and the spouses have not chosen their partner at all or have any foundation for love. Also, Desdemona gave up her stable lifestyle and took a risk in "betraying" her father to be loyal to Othello, which proves she truly intends to be with him. (or just reallllly hates her father.)And while Othello's doubts in Desdemona's fadelity, i dont' think that speaks lowly of their love. Moreover, I think Shakepeare is trying to display that people are weak and vulnerable to manipulation by hearsay. I believe he is trying to prove that even the strongest of loves and the strongest of men can be undone.
To put it simply, I believe that Othello and Desdemona love what the other represents. These two remind me of hormonal teenagers who fall in love at first sight, disobey their parents (Brabantio), and run off to their honeymoon (Cyprus), only to get a divorce when they return to the "real world." However, in this case, Othello and Desdemona can not get a divorce, so...
Anyone has to admit that Othello and Desdemona made some very good speeches to the Duke. But I think that we must consider the idea that Othello was always a good speaker and can sell a product like no other (except Iago). And as for Desdemona, even a teenager (experts at lying) would be able to fool another with the right amount of flattery and eye-lash fluttering.
In conclusion, I do not classify this as true love and their marriage is doomed from the start. After all, this play is called "The 'Tragedy' of Othello, the Moor of Venice."
There is no way to truly classify love, especially when we are looking at a relationship in Shakespeare's time. Marriage was different from today. Othello married Desdemona because she is a suitable wife, and Desdemona married Othello because he is a powerful figure in society with a good reputation. Once they are married they are pretty much together forever no matter how they feel about one another. Today people can decide whether or not they truly "love" eachother, they can end a relationship like it never happened. It's hard to determine if love is "true" because love can mean something different to everyone. It can be a feeling that changes over time and it changes when the couple is put into different situations or chapters of their life. When I look at Desdemona and Othello I do not see a relationship that could last forever, but I see some feeling towards eachother. Desdemona would not betray her father unless she really did want to be with Othello. Othello wants to have a wife that he can trust. But, this want is only a feeling, just as love is only a word to describe a feeling towards another person, a feeling that time can change.
I too agree with Karolina/Faith/Pelton/Himalolipop. I mean at first their love seemed really passionate and youthful, and it definitely was pleasing to read about. Theres this forbidden love and an overbearing father that stands in the way. It's love between a black man and a white woman, a marriage unaccepted and looked down upon. When the two each make their seperate speeches, however, we kind of find out more about them. We learn that Othello loves Desdemona but LOVES the fact that he is cared about, and that Desdemona loves Othello but LOVES the fact that he's so adventurous and heroic. It's one of those "match made in heaven" kind of things- BUT AT FIRST.
now that they are together, that same passionate love is being replaced. they are fighting, avoiding eachother, and keeping secrets. Maybe their true love existed at first, but love fades in time. They really didn't KNOW eachother and now that they are together all the time things have gotten much more difficult. Maybe they would be better suited as friends because they have so much in common. They share interests, well actually love the other's interests, so maybe that's why we were decieved at first. I'm leaning more towards they love what eachother represents. But now that Iago's chaning Othello, we can only wonder what's going to happen...
At first I thought that Othello and Desdemona have a solid base for their love. To understand each other is a really good foundation for their love to grow and for them to become really close. Sometimes understanding each other is a flaw in relationships... so it's good that Othello and Desdemona possess that. They also did get married and that does have to account for something. I don't think that they would get married with absolutely no feelings towards each other. With this, in addition to thinking positively, you can become convinced with their love.
Then, you move forward where Iago starts talking to Othello about the "relationship" between Desdemona and Cassio. As soon as Othello starts to believe Iago without even thinking to talk to Desdemona about it... you know their love isn't true. You always hear that the key to a successful relationship is communication, and apparently they have none of that whatsoever. Therefore, their love really isn't emotionally true.
Okay...it's difficult to assess love, as most of you have indicated. Comparatively speaking, then, who can we compare to Des and Othello? Edward Cullen and Bella Swan (yes, I made another Twilight reference)? Gatsby and Daisy? Romeo and Juliet? Catherine and Heathcliff? Jane Eyre and Rochester? Meredith and McDreamy? :)
I have to agree with the majority of the posts before me. I think that they love what they each represent. At first I did think that they were truly in love, because they both understood each other. They knew where each was coming from and how they felt, so they could support each other. I think there was something more than just the exciting stories and the sympathy. They probably found they really were in love, so they got excited and quickly married.
But as I said, I think that their love isn’t true. I honestly don’t think it is going to last. Both of them loving each other for what they represent isn’t going to be enough to keep their love alive. Their love just isn’t strong enough.
Going off of Wink's "comparison" comment...I'd like to compare Desdemona and Othello to two other couples. First, I think they're similar to Daisy and Gatsby. Desdemona and Othello are both enthralled with each other, but when push comes to shove, their "love" can't get them through even a week of marriage. They are totally unraveled in a matter of days! Similarly, Daisy and Gatsby's false love is eventually undone. In fact, I think one way to measure true love is by the way a couple handles hardship. Another couple I'd like to compare them to is Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy. (stop hatin' miss winkler, I know you're no fan of jane austin) They're in similar situations...Elizabeth is "below" Mr. Darcy in class due to her family like Othello's race sets him below Desdemona (in the story). The difference between the two couples is that Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy's love was not just infatuation, but a deep, true love that grew in time. In fact, they hated each other for quite a while! Therefore, I'd say they had a stronger foundation for love, so when things went wrong, they still ended up together in the end.
Ok, so I noticed that most of the comments point to Desdemona and Othello never actually being in love, which I found to be really surprising. I tend to think that Desdemona and Othello were in actually in love. I would not qualify their feelings as “true love” because of what occurs throughout the play, but I am genuinely shocked by the lack of confidence in relationships that everyone seems to have. I believe that Desdemona’s actions in leaving her family and father was an act of love, and I believe that Othello’s respect for Desdemona at the beginning of the play indicates a bond that cannot be described as pure “lust.” They may love what one another represents, but that in itself is a form of love (not necessarily lust). Instead, I believe that their love is really part of the meaning of the play, displaying how strong feelings that are corrupted remain strong feelings (just in another sense). Now, just to clarify, I do not believe that you could ever call Desdemona and Othello’s relationship true love. In my opinion true love grows over time, such as with Noah and Allie in The Notebook. The failure of their love only indicates that they are human and are subject to human emotions. I am sure that everyone has seen marriages fall apart. Does this failure of a marriage indicate that the two people never loved each other? I believe that Desdemona and Othello’s relationship and love can be related to a broken marriage. The reason that it ended so quickly was for the simple fact that Shakespeare wrote a play, not a novel. He meant the play to move quickly for the sake of the viewers and really could not include weeks/months of plot between Desdemona and Othello. (Actually this quick approach is probably much more effective point than a novel would be!)
Would you have thought that Desdemona and Othello loved each other had their relationship been longer?
I don’t think that Othello is really in love with Desdemona herself; he is in love with her stability. Similarly, Desdemona can’t really be in love with Othello if she chooses to lie to him when she does not have the handkerchief. If she truly loved him, she would not do this kind of thing; she would expect him to understand her. At the same time, Othello should not be suspecting her of being unfaithful; true love should be based on trust.
As Faith said, Othello and Desdemona’s relationship is not based on love, but rather how they understand each other. They are attracted to each other because one has what the other doesn’t. Othello appreciates Desdemona for her stability and Desdemona likes Othello for his adventures. Othello mentions it in his speech and it was the reason they came together in the first place.
I think Othello really just likes the idea of Desdemona rather than the actual Desdemona herself. He is kind of like Gatsby from The Great Gatsby. Othello had said “Excellent wretch! Perdition catch my soul, / But I do love thee! and when I love thee not, / Chaos is come again” (3.3.100-102) when Desdemona was absent. It is as of he can express his love for her when she is not there because he is thinking of her. The thought of her can make him happy but not the presence. This is NOT love.
So alot of these posts seem to say that Desdemona and Othello were moreso in love with the idea of being in love than they were with each other. Well I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that at that point in the play, I really did think they were in love. Now im not saying that it was TRUE love, but i also don't think that the only thing uniting them was what they each represented. In the beginning of the play, Desdemona really sacrificed alot to be with Othello. And i think thats a big part of love, making sacrifices for the ones that you really care about. Similarly, Othello stood up to Desdemona's father and argued his case before the judge. Now come on, if they didnt love each other, then why wouldnt he just give it all up right then. He cared about her, and he wasnt just going to leave her in such a delicate situation, especially after she had already angered her father and could no longer go back to him. They risked their reputations (which was very important back then) to be with each other because they loved each other. And for Othello, a black man living in that time period, to stand up to Brabantio and all the rest of the people who dissaproved of their love and called him awful names was a very brave thing to do. But like Othello said, that's what love can do to people. It can charm them and help to to believe that anything is possible.
Even throughout the play there have been many instances where it seems clear that Desdemona and Othello love each other. I mean, when Othello is plotting against Desdemona, he has a hard time focusing because he is remembering the happy times that they had previously shared. Just think of Othello's situation. If your best friend (Iago in this case) sincerely told you that your wife/husband was cheating on you, and there was plentyyy of evidence that seemed to make it true, wouldn't you be furious with him/her? Now dont get me wrong I know that Othello was furious, but despite all the horrible things that he continued to hear about Desdemona, he still cared for her and he was distracted by the love that they had shared. Now to me, that really seems like love.
As far as true love goes, I really agree with Angel. True love does need time to grow, and I would've loved to see what their love could've turned into if this were a novel and not a play that took place in 48 hours. I don't really believe in the whole "love at first sight" thing. You need to really have time to get to know someone. But Othello and Desdemona had so many people and circumstances that were not in their favor, so they never had that chance to get to true love. As for Emilia and Iago who's love had grown over time and seemed to show very little signs of such a promising beginning as Othello's and Desdemona's, well that's another story... :)
Since the beginning, I felt that Othello and Desdemona was really in love. I don't know but I just think that she loved him for who he was. She tells her father that Othello IS her husband. She didn't try to deny it. Neither did she refuse to talk about it. I picture a strong woman standing in front of her father, surrounded by others, and admitting her love for Othello. I think that takes guts and that just proves that she truly does love Othello. If she hadn't done that, then maybe there would be some doubt, but that didn't happen.
But I understand the other view on their love. It could be a possibility that Desdemona just loves Othello for the "danger" he possess. She's finally going against what her father wants. She says, "To you I am bound for life and education". Most likely, she wanted to get away from the I guess, overprotected life that she has been living. Thus, making Desdemona and Othello's love not true. Both views make sense to me but I still believe that she truly loved him and vice versa.
Even at the end of the play, I still felt that they loved each other.
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